Yankees 5, Rays 10: Weird baseball turned into a weird nightmare

The Yankees and Rays had never played a 14-inning game prior to tonight. After tonight, everyone subjected to the 5+ hour nightmare has to hope they are never forced to witness such failure on a baseball diamond again. In the end, the Rays' bullpen withstood more blows than the Yankees' bullpen did and the Yankees lost a game that they had multiple opportunities to win.

You'll have to forgive me for not wanting to recount all the gory details of this one back to you. Really, I'm doing it as a favor. If you missed it, you're lucky. If you didn't miss it, I'm not mean enough to make you re-live it. Instead, here is a brief breakdown of key events.

The Good:

- Jacoby Ellsbury had four hits (including a game-tying single with two outs), a stolen base, and reached base on an intentional walk. It was his tenth multi-hit game of 2014 so far.

- Brian Roberts came alive in extra innings, picking up crucial singles in the 9th, 11th, and 13th innings. He also stole third base.

- Mark Teixeira and Alfonso Soriano hit back-to-back home runs in the eighth inning to tie the game at 4-4. Brian McCann also had a home run on the night.

- Dellin Betances, Preston Claiborne, Shawn Kelley, and Adam Warren were brilliant in relief. The fact the game went on so long is a testament to how well they were able to give the offense a chance.

- Joe Girardi continues to be a master of replay, getting a crucial play originally called a fielder's choice turned into a double play off the bat of Matt Joyce. Joe Maddon was ejected for arguing the call.

The Bad:

- Derek Jeter went 0 for 7 for the first time in his career. He'd never been worse than 0 for 6 in 20 seasons.

- Ellsbury lost a ball in the lights and that, somehow, caused Vidal Nuno to lose the strike zone. Nuno really struggled to collect himself after the misplay.

- The Yankees failed to score in three innings against Heath Bell or one inning against Josh Lueke.

- Chris Leroux was the only available reliever left in the bullpen, and he pitched like the last guy out of the bullpen. He allowed five runs in the top of the 14th inning.

- The last time the Yankees had 18 hits and lost was 2002. I was in seventh grade.

- Masahiro Tanaka is pretty much going to have to pitch a complete game tomorrow. Good luck, new friend.

The Ugly:

- This happened:

Yeah, I don't know either. It was scored a 4-3-3-6-3-4-3-4-5-2 double play. Okay.

Erase the bad thoughts of all of this by whatever means necessary. Thankfully Tanaka Time comes soon. In about twelve hours, actually. See you then.