As you may recall, last time out we chronicled David Cone’s perfect game. Strikeouts and good fielding are essential facets of perfect games, the former keeping the ball out of play (where things will, one way or another, eventually go wrong), and the latter keeping the ball in check when it does end up in play. Sure, there’s a little bit of luck involved—it helps if the ball is hit at a fielder—but, really, there are plenty of players out there that can’t be trusted to safely field a slow dribbler hit directly at them, even if they've had twenty minutes to track it. Don't just take my word for it: look no further for evidence of this than these exquisite examples of Yankees fielding.
Those Ramiro Pena Days
Who would you rather have in the infield: Ramiro Pena or Eduardo Nunez? Ramiro Pena or Prince Fielder? (Pro: A ball hit at Fielder will at least be blocked by his mass. Con: A ball hit at Fielder may very well be absorbed by his mass.) Ramiro Pena or a Sumatran tiger? Ramiro Pena or a Gummi Venus de Milo? (Okay, okay. So the metrics sort of say that Ramiro Pena is about average in the field and would probably be a better option than all of the above. But, really, which are you going to trust, the metrics or my GIFs?)
DOINK!: Kelly Johnson
Considered a successor to the world-famous DOINK!
That’s Not Baseball, Johnny Damon
A Slow Go Down, Like the Titanic
You know those moments in life when you’re in the middle of tripping over something, but you’re, like, staggering, and your brain desperately tries to correct and fix your footing like a hamster scrambling around a wheel, but you can’t do anything about it, and then a moment before you fall you’re like oh I’m going to fall, and then you fall? Yeah.
Live From the Scene
Let’s check in with our AARP correspondent to see how he feels about these vulgar displays of fielding:
And since we’re still sort of on the matter of David Cone’s perfect game...
B-Side: Mr. Cone, Why Is It That You Yourself Do Not Have Your Own Jig?
The El Duque
Get With It, Old Man
So, the eye roll girl is great, but don’t overlook the face made by the one in the animal print dress. Superb.
Luis Sojo Asks the Tough Questions
Now I Know Why You Don’t Have a Dance
Starring David Cone, a man, and the cleanest club bathroom in history.
But I can't leave you without recutting some of these as Utility GIFs:
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