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Yankees News and Notes - I'mGivingYouACaseOfTheMondays

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Yesterday afternoon the Yankees defeated the Athletics and managed to complete a sweep of the series. Sweeps are always good. Hiroki Kuroda listened to Jedi and managed to not disappoint, pitching eight shutout innings. Eight shutout innings are always good. I'm sure people will spout "but it was against the A's" till their throat goes hoarse. These people being unable to speak is always good. The A's are a major league baseball team and if Kuroda did not have good stuff yesterday, they would have and should have hit him just like any team would.

Russell Martin was out of the lineup yesterday due to either a stiff neck or a stiff upper lip, which while normal for the British can be quite dangerous for those of French and French Canadian descent. It is unclear how long he will be out of the lineup for but Girardi is hopeful he will be back tonight against the Angels. I'm hopeful his mustache will be gone. More on this story as it tweetvelops, which is a perfectly cromulent word.

Derek Jeter continued to make HISTORY! WITH AN INTOLERABLE RADIO SHOW!! yesterday as he passed George "required by law to show the pine tar clip every time his name is mentioned" Brett on the all time MLB hit list with his leadoff single. Jeter is now 14th on the list until he gets thirty more hits and surpasses Cal Ripken Jr. Maybe by then I will be over making fun of the inane HISTORY! Kay bullshit.

Tonight (later than usual due to this west coast hogwash) Phil Hughes will face off against Jered Weaver much like Nicolas Cage and John Travolta faced off against each other in the movie Face/Off. Actually I hope it's nothing like that since I despise that movie. Hughes grew up about 10 minutes away from Angel Stadium and his family and friends will be attending the game. Nothing like a little added excitement/pressure when you're going up against Weaver. Perhaps one day I'll take Hughes off my fantasy bench. Damn insane superstition.

Roy Halladay had to leave the Phillies-Cardinals game early yesterday due to shoulder soreness. It is unclear whether or not he will need an MRI. Since everyone else seems to need one this year, my money is on Halladay going for one as well.