I'm sure you guys remember the stupid emails I have posted on this site before. I received an especially stupid one last night from a guy who said he "reads the site, but also poops so don't get too cocky." Well, there you have it. The subject of the email was "thoughts about the past, present, and future."
Here is the email, with no editing outside of his name, and what is in the parentheses -
Hola Brandon it is (his name here) This year has been very rough and tough for the bombers from the bronx from new york. (Loving the capitals!) We went into the year looking for nothing short of the world series and came out of the year with a ton of drunken dissapointed fans. Including myself. So after tonights game i decided to write you about my thoughts and stuff. I hope you use this on pa i don't have a username but wud be fine with you using it.
For the past season there have been many dissapointment signings and stuff. Chan Ho Park, Randy Winn, Boone Logan, and Javier Vaz I can't win a ballgame quez. Chan Ho was the biggest dissapointment he was bad like that Duggan dude at predicting stuff in your prediction post. He no funny. Just call him Chan Ho Duggan. Winn didn't live up to his name he became Randy Lossmachine. The actual playing was poor and the managing i will get to in a minute. Chad Gaudin played as bad as his beered and Curtis GrandersonJuan Miranda dude got his nickname Win Miranda with the walk off walk. Dude can look. played like a girl. Call him Curty Granderdaughter. The bright spot in the season was when that
The present is tough. We have to work on watching other teams and not crying about the outcomes thinking it could have been us. We can do it.
The future is tough. We have to work on getting rid of some people and getting some new people. First, fourmost, fivemost even! We need to fire Joe the Joey man can't Girardi. Girardi is stupid. Stupid is Girardi. Either way he made terrible decisions and couldn't figure out to put freaking Mo in when Hughes struggled. Cmon dude Mo is shutdown we have Joba to close if we need to! Long won't be hitting coach for.....Long! Eiland should be stranded on himself and Harkey should barkey his way to a new team.
Cliff Lee should not be a yankee. The Yankees should sign him and trade him to the RoyalsBilly Butler so Arod can slap something not named Jeter. (That was cleverly dumb) Maybe the Yankees should sign Crawford and put Gardner in center Granderson in right and Swisher at first. Teixeira played some infield when he was younger so make him DH. Cervelli should be third base backup and backup catcher and Pena should be traded for a tree or something maybe a doenut. for Soria and Granky and maybe have them throw in
If none of this happens maybe the team should change there name to the stupids. Thats what they would be. I dont know what you think but A.J. Burnett needs to become a reliever and Aceves can be a starter again. A.J. has lights out stuff for a reliever and he can take over for Kerry Wood and Wood can go to the Mets or something and be there new GM. Oh well I am rambling now but this took a lot out of me I need some more orange juice or something.
So, stupidest one yet? Hopefully this provides some laughs after elimination.