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Lonely A-Rod needs help with his holiday plans

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Let's take a break from all the serious analysis and Hot Stove talk here at Pinstripe Alley. It is the holiday season, after all, and in the spirit of the season -- and the charity work Curtis Granderson loves -- there is someone amongst us we need to help.

Alex Rodriguez!

See, we know poor A-Rod has split with Kate Hudson. Apparently, it was one baseball season and done for Kate. This means, our man Alex is all alone for the holidays. Let's help him find companionship for Christmas.

Elin Nordegren

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via i193.photobucket.com

Lord knows, Tiger Woods' soon-to-be ex-wife could use some comforting this Christmas. So could Alex. Oh, and Alex offers so much more stability than Tiger. I think we have a match!

Jessica Simpson

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C'mon, Jess! Billy Corgan of Smashing Pumpkins? You can do better than that. Help a lonely baseball player out, will ya? Then again, you didn't exactly bring Tony Romo good luck. Maybe this one is a bad idea.

Britney Spears

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via farm4.static.flickr.com

Yeah, she is a little bit nuts. No denying that. But, shoot, you know Alex has already tried Madonna. Let's get these two fixed up!

Reese Witherspoon

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via www.shinystyle.tv

Just split with long-time beau Jake Gyllenhall. Obviously, needs a shoulder to cry on. How can you say no, Alex?

Anne Hathaway

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via z.about.com

She is obviously a mess right now. I mean, she just got in an accident with a bicyclist the other day. Her boyfriend turns out to be a crook. C'mon, Alex. She needs all that stability we know you can provide. Oh wait, that's Derek Jeter I was thinking of. Ah well, have some holiday fun, anyway!

Anybody else want to take a stab at playing matchmaker for A-Rod? I know there have to be other alternatives.