Joe Girardi is taking roll and making up nicknames

Yes. My refrigerator is running. Why do you ask? - USA TODAY Sports

Having trouble figuring out who is available for the Yankees? So is Joe Girardi. Take an inside look at Joe Girardi as he takes roll and invents a few new nicknames.

1371911808Things haven't gone exactly as planned this year for your old New York Yankees. I'm trying to figure out who we even have to put on the field. Let's do a roll call. Just say here after I call your name. Gardy.

1371912310 Here

1371911808 CC?

1371912432 Here.

1371911808 Hiroki?

1371912625 Here.

1371911808 Sarge?

1371912822 Here.

1371912432 Why does he call you Sarge?

1371912822 First it was Andy, then it was Petty, then Tom Petty, then just Tom, then Major Tom, Major General, then General, and after a couple of bad starts, he busted me down to Sarge.

1371911808Pipe down you two. Robbie?

13719131231371913231 Here.

1371911808Well that's a problem. We can't have two Robbies. Cano, you're still Robbie. Mr. Robertson, you are now Davey.

1371913519 What about me?

1371911808 That little solution just created another problem. We can't have two Daveys. You guys know I run a pretty tight ship. Adams, you are now Artie. It's short for Artist. Get it K-Long?

1371913743 The irony of calling somebody an artist when they can't even draw a walk is not lost on me, Skip.

1371911808 Heyo. Okay, who's next? Jetes?

1371913926 He's not here.

1371911808 Nixy? What are you still doing here?

1371913926 I'm a professional ballplayer. Ask John Sterling.

1371911808 Fine. So where's Jetes?

1371913926 He's been cleared for baseball related activities.

1371912023 Baseball related activities? What does that even mean? He can eat a hot dog and sing Take Me Out to the Ball Game? Baseball related activities. Gimme a break. Let me know when he's cleared for actual baseball activities.

1371911808 Travy Haffy. You still here?

1371914289 Here, sir.

1371911808Got to say I did not see that coming. Is Tex here? I could have sworn I just saw him. Tex?

1371914501 He's not here.

1371911808Oh man. We are going to miss him. Who are you?

1371914501Zoilo Almonte

1371911808 From now on you are Z.

1371914501 Why?

1371910963 WHY NOT!

1371911808Moving along, is Ichi here?

1371914941 Here.

1371911808Good. Where's Scratchy? Get it? Ichi and Scratchy. I know. We don't have a...wait a second. Who are you?

1371915165I'm Lyle Overbay. I've been in the big leagues for 13 years. I've made around 1200 starts at first base in my career, and I've been here literally the entire season.

1371911808Lyle? You don't look like much of a Lyle to me. Your name is Scratchy now, and you're going to be Ichi's platoon partner. Ichi and Scratchy in right field. Can't wait to see what hijinks you two get up to.

1371915165We both hit left-handed, sir.

1371911808Too late, it's in the binder.

1371915165I've never played the outfield before.

1371911808What part of it's in the binder did you not understand? Can't go back now. Things are looking up, boys. Mo? You here?

1371915518 Here

1371911808 All right. A-Rod?

...

1371911808 Cervelli?

...

1371911133 Pineda? Anybody seen Pineda?

...

1371911508 What about Youk? Is Youk here?

...

1371910786 Grandy? Please tell me Grandy is here.

...

1371911383 We could be in for a long summer, boys.

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