Citing a need for physical and spiritual cleansing after a Boston Red Sox fan entombed a David Ortiz jersey in the floor of the new facility, the New York Yankees buried former centerfielder Bernie Williams under 4,650 pounds of concrete Wednesday in the foundation of the new Yankee Stadium for good luck.
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"By giving Bernie this chance, we have once again proven why we are the classiest organization in all of sports," [Randy] Levine added. "Lesser teams would have overreacted to this whole curse thing and buried Derek Jeter."